I want. A lot of things.

Sunday, January 27, 2008

Friday, January 25, 2008

Thursday, January 10, 2008

with nothing but sky between us

I went not knowing what to expect. Only my best friend can truly make me happy. He is the only one who ever can tell by my voice over a static ridden phone call that something's wrong. So i find my trip was healthy, if not for my body, at least my soul. yes that invisible being inside me which holds my conscience, and my beliefs.
The plane was shaky, the passengers aggravated, the attendants pleasant, and the toddlers unhappy with the sudden change in pressure.
The city was as I had left it. A place full of empty people with empty goals, fast cars, and road rage. Through the window I saw the approaching orange roofs which could only mean palm beach county. The landing was rough, and the passengers pushing to get off the plane. I left my watch back in Chapel hill.

The thought struck me, that i really have no home. No place feels like home. Not chapel hill, nor West Palm, nor Greensboro. I feel out of place in every location. Perhaps this is because i haven't found my home yet. or just that my constant relocation leaves my soul confused as to where it belongs. Is it in Chapel Hill with my parents? Is it Delaware with my family? Is it West Palm with my best friend? or is it Greensboro with my boyfriend and education? my body drives me towards Greensboro, with the person who I can't help but think about all the time. But is this the place for me? I don't think so. I couldn't imagine myself in Greensboro permanently. That would be hell. there is no future there for me. I find that people go to Greensboro to become slaves of their addictions. People go to chapel hill for a promising education for their children. People go to West Palm expecting the lifestyle of a millionaire. and frankly i can't think of any reason for anyone to go to Delaware.

(photo by Jessica Fritz)